It’s that time of year again. You know what time I’m talking about. New Year, New You. You’ve said to yourself that 2022 is the year. I can feel it. This is the year where you and everything around you change for the better. It’s the year where you finally lose the weight, meet the person, get the position, finish the degree, deal with the trauma drama from the past. There’s just one thing standing in your way. Can you guess what it is? It’s not your boss, job, parents, or spouse. Oftentimes, we spend too much time and energy focused on our external circumstances. We pray, listen to podcasts, and watch videos. We spend the year making tons of effort to change our external circumstances only to end the year having made little to no progress. If you haven’t guessed the answer to the question above regarding what’s standing in your way, it’s you. Many times, we stand in our own way, and we hinder our own progress. Hear me out for a second before thinking I’m wrong for writing this.
Yes, I know trauma from the past is real, and must be dealt with. I know interpersonal relationships with family, friends, and lovers can be frustrating. I know you want to be more stable financially and feel and look better physically. I’m not saying don’t give attention and effort to the desired changes you want to make in your life. What I’m saying is instead of only focusing on the external changes and what’s wrong with everyone else, start focusing on the internal changes you need to make. Turn your gaze inward. Who do you need to forgive, what suppressed memory do you need to revisit to heal, what insecurity or fear do you need to face, what negative thoughts do you need to replace, what patterns of behavior do you need to change?
Every aspiration you have to better your life is awesome and amazing. I encourage you to dream big and work towards your goals. However, once you attain it are you able to maintain it? For example, you may diet for six months and finally lose the weight. Now you can finally wear that dress you have hung up. But during the time of dieting are you learning about nutrition and exercise, or are you just trying to lose the weight for the summertime? You may finally meet the person you’ve been praying for. However, have you developed emotional stability, do you know your value, your worth, can you be committed and faithful to one person? Imagine, what if you do you get the position and the raise. Have you developed the work ethic, and personal responsibility and accountability to excel in the position and lead others?
I do believe this year will be better than the years prior. It’s not going to be better by simply saying it, or because we have our colorful vision boards on the wall. The only way this year will be better for you is if you make the decision to turn your gaze inward and change from within. We can’t heal and grow in what we don’t acknowledge. This week, take some time to journal and reflect on the things you have been trying to ignore about yourself. It may be ugly, but it’s your truth. Pray and invite God into this time. You can start by saying…Lord, what do I need to change, what do I need to work on? If you wait long enough, I’m confident the answers will come to you.